GETTING A SEAT
The Vortex is a casual joint, so we seat on a first-come, first-served basis. We do not take reservations. Don’t bother phoning ahead, because even if you speak with an employee you still do NOT have a reservation. Do you know why? Because we don’t take reservations, that’s why.
Let’s just be clear right up front. The Vortex was not designed to accommodate large parties, especially when we’re busy. Of course we always do our best to serve everyone, but if you are foolish enough to show up with your 20 best friends at eight o’clock on a Friday night, don’t cry like a little bitch when we tell you it’s going to be a very long wait for a table. There are plenty of places that offer reservations and special event rooms for your large group. We think using those venues would probably result in a better experience for everyone. Especially us.
Be advised that we do not seat incomplete parties during any peak business period, and we decide what constitutes a peak period. We know all your little tricks and lies too, you tricky, lying little bastards, so don’t even try them. Just enjoy a tasty drink from the bar while you wait on your slack-assed friends.
We always want our patrons to hang-out and enjoy themselves. But if you have finished eating and drinking, have paid your check, and can see that other people are waiting for tables, be considerate and give up your seat so the next group can enjoy the experience. Come on, you’re done. Don’t be the clueless table of campers. Someday, when you’re the one waiting for a table, you will really appreciate this policy. And if you have taken up a table for hours and hours on end, don’t forget to tip your server accordingly.
The Vortex does not offer an option for Private Parties or Corporate Events, as we do not have a separate room to host such activities, and can generally not accommodate large groups (see above). However, for an *EXORBITANT amount of money, we might agree to displace our regular customers, and offer a "BUY-OUT" for a specific, and limited window of time. See below for more information about this option.
*ex·or·bi·tant (igˈzôrbitənt) Adjective: going far beyond what is fair, reasonable, or expected: too high, expensive, etc. Synonyms: extortionate, prohibitive, outrageous, unreasonable, inflated, unconscionable, huge, enormous, over the top.
Generally we only offer the Buy-Out option at our Midtown location. It is a larger space, so it can better accomodate larger groups. But again, everything is negotiable. The total number of seats at tables in Midtown is approximately 130. There are also approximately 30 stools at the bar, making a total of approximately 160 seats available on the premises. Of course, for a private party, there is standing room as well. At certain times we may also be able to open the Laughing Skull Lounge to accommodate additional people. At other times the Lounge may be operational, and thus not available.
NUMBER OF ATTENDEES:
The number of guests should not exceed 200 at any given point during the event.
DAYS AND TIMES AVAILABLE:
Any day and/or time can be negotiated for a Buy-Out. For your information, the Buy-Out amount will vary based on the day and time of the event. Days are generally cheaper than nights, and early in the week is generally cheaper than later in the week.
The minimum "Buy-Out fee" required in order for us to close The Vortex to the public will be a base amount of $10,000.00. Busier business days and times will require a larger base Buy-Out fee. The negotiated Buy-Out fee will be due and payable in advance of the scheduled event. Food and beverage purchases will be an additional charge, and will be billed separately at the end of the event.
We will not allow outside food or caterers to be brought onto our premises. The Vortex will provide a full kitchen staff including an appropriate number of cooks, food runners, busboys and dishwashers. We will also provide a full service staff including an appropriate number of servers and bartenders. We will also provide a manager, to act as your contact during the event, and a security guard to admit and monitor guests, and to maintain safety during the event.
FOOD AND BEVERAGE SERVICE:
We do not do any catering or "buffet-style" food preparation. Your guests will be free to order any food and beverage contained within our regular menus directly from the service staff, just like when we're open to the public. In order to determine appropriate staffing for the event, a minimum sales amount for food and beverages will need to be negotiated prior to the event.
FOOD AND BEVERAGE PAYMENT:
This amount will simply be based on the orders placed by your guests. Standard "guest checks" will be maintained for verification purposes. The total purchases will be tallied at the end of the event, and the total amount will be payable via cash or a single credit card. A 20% gratuity will be added which will go directly to the service staff. Additional gratuity may be given at your discretion.
MOVIE MAKING - LOCATION PURPOSES:
The Vortex is also available as a film location, but a minimum Buy-Out fee for these purposes may be even more expensive than for a private event.
STILL INTERESTED? CONTACT US:
If none of this information has scared you away, feel free to send us an email to explore this option further. We’ll get back to you. Also, the more advance lead-time you can provide prior to your event, the better.